huuffff, finally its almost the end of this year everyone...
I get a lot of new story in this year, it was so awesome.. it triple times better than what I've felt last year..
but the worse one is my biggest resolution for this year to "fix" my self was failed again..
y just lets to write it again that thing on my resolution for next year..hehehe
one story that I want to share this time is still related to my last entry before..
y so two days ago one of my friend tell me, if she has meet with the man "You-Know-Who" or "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named" for a little reunion..
i have know if that man will be back to here for a vacation in this month, and i've guess if he will make a clarification to them about what was happen between us..
i exactly didn't know what was he said to my friends and i think, i don't need to ask also.. i just asking my friend if she has sent my regards for him.. and she say yes
then she said, if we should meet each other sometime to clear this problem, because what was happened between us is just because a misunderstanding...
he really cares to me but he can't express it directly to me and until now he always pray for me..
and he feels glad to know that i was so happy to life in the direction that i've choose now
yup, after that i just keep thinking about her last message..
HE REALLY CARES TO YOU, BUT HE CAN'T EXPRESSED IT
hmm, i just says... really ???
if he really cares about me, why he can't express it?
is it really embarrassing to cares each other, or maybe is it so shameful because both of us the man?
y whatever.. i can't see his truly heart and can't read his mind
i just say a big thanks... if its true..
but make a flashback again, i wondering in which part he has show his careful to me?
when i graduated from the college, when i accepted to that damn campus #upsss#
does he ever say something, give a congrats to me or what... hmm, its no
when i was struggling to finish all requirements that need to go there,
does he ever give me a hand or offering some helps... hmm, its no
its 180 degree different than he has done to his "beloved sons"
he gave a full supports to help them in every their problems, he even went back to here just to pick up them directly, they are going everywhere together, they sharing and live in the same room together...
haha, where is my position in that beautiful story?
y i'm exactly so far from them.. he even not says a welcome when i arrived there.. hmm, so pathetic
but its ok, i never blame him for what was happen..
i just to late to realize where is my position.. from the beginning we were not too close, and because i'm too ignorant i have put a big hope into him..
y its my mistake.. not his fault.. :)
yup, lets finish all of it now.. we have a new and better life now..
and of course we were so happy and proud of it.. right?
maybe until now i still can't see and understand what the definition of your cares to me..
i even can't distinguish is it care or hatred...
y a real proof that you do will be more effective for me, than so many words that you says
but whatever it is, i just want to send one pray for you
i hope you can be more mature, have a big responsible, wise in behave and honest in every ways
y i think u will be a better man later
and just find your loosing ribs soon...hehehe
y that's it..
long and nice holiday is coming soon, just have a blessing and wonderful holiday everyone... ^^
